Code of conduct

As a Registered Member of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) I work within an ethical framework for good practice. This means that I adhere to a strict professional code of conduct which you can read about on the BACP site.  I am also in clinical supervision and regular therapy.


I do not share any client work or identifying information in public, in line with the commitment to confidentiality I hold for my clients. I may on occasion discuss non-identifiable details with my supervisor(s) in order to better support my work with clients. Any information shared in supervision will be consistent with previously agreed confidentiality agreements.

In exceptional circumstances, the need to safeguard you or others from serious harm may require me to override my commitment to making your wishes and confidentiality my primary concern. In such circumstances, I will do my best to respect the parts of your wishes or confidences that do not need to be overridden in order to prevent serious harm. If you have any questions about what would constitute exceptional circumstances, feel free to contact me for clarification. 

General Policies

These are my general policies for interactions in both online and off-line (in person) spaces. Due to the small and highly networked nature of the UK and worldwide polyamorous, queer, and kinky communities (especially for those of us who are racially minoritised), there is a possibility that I may unknowingly be in the same social space as a client. The policies below on how to manage that will form part of the contract that we will discuss and agree upon before working together.

Social media and the online world is constantly changing and developing, so I will do my best to update and amend this page over time. 

If you need to contact me for any reason, including if you have any questions regarding anything I've posted, I would prefer this to be done via email or the contact form on this website rather than messaging via social media platforms.

Last updated: 14th June 2023

In-person community meetups, kink clubs, etc

If we unintentionally attend the same queer, polyamory, kink or other meetup, club, munch or event, there is a high likelihood that I will choose to leave the event in order to maintain the boundaries of our professional therapist-client relationship. If I do so, I will not reveal any information on my reason to either the host or other attendees. In the event that there is some reason I am not able to leave, I will acknowledge you only in the event that you choose to do so first (and only to the extent that you address me). I will not reveal any further information about you or our professional connection without your express permission, in line with my policies on confidentiality. 

As a community organiser, there is a possibility that you may encounter me at certain meetups or events where I am hosting, and therefore not able to leave. In this situation, I will acknowledge you as a general member of the community with no reference to our professional relationship as counsellor and client, unless otherwise indicated by you. 

If we happen to encounter each other in public in any other context (such as passing in the street or at a supermarket or other activity), I will likewise follow your lead in either acknowledging me or not, including the extent of our connection.

General social media

As my client, I would recommend you read this page to understand what I will be doing to try and keep the boundaries from blurring between 'public personas' and our work together within the therapy room. In an ideal situation, the counsellor's personal life would be entirely separate from the counselling relationship, unless self-disclosure is deemed to be beneficial to the client. However, in a world of social media and ever-closer merging of the public, private, and professional, boundaries are no longer as straight forward. I aim to address here how I believe this open availability of the online world could have an impact on our counselling relationship.

I do have social media accounts, both for my personal life and for my work, including as a community organiser. I will not accept or send any 'friend requests' via these accounts for current or former clients, to prevent any unprofessional blurring of boundaries. I also do not post about any client work on these accounts, in line with the commitment to confidentiality I hold for my clients. 

Due to the nature of Facebook, Linkedin, Twitter, and similar social media platforms, it may be that our paths cross due to mutual groups, pages, or connections. If this becomes apparent, please bring the topic to our next session and we will discuss the impact of this. The most likely outcome will be that I block your profile to avoid any online interactions.  As above, I will never discuss any client content on this account, but I may use these to talk about a number of topics, including my therapy work (in a generalised way). You are welcome to engage with these pages by liking content or commenting; though do note the nature of your comments may limit your anonymity. 

Discord and Facebook

I am an admin or member of a number of discord servers and Facebook groups or Pages for both private and professional use, including community organising. Due to the personal content and nature of both, it can be challenging to maintain suitable interpersonal boundaries and the therapeutic relationship if we were to find out we were members of the same server or group. Discord is also limited in the range of tools available for restricting interactions. 

As mentioned above, I will not accept or send any 'friend requests' via these accounts for current or former clients and if we were to cross paths this would need to be discussed in the next session to outline our expectations around boundaries regarding interactions. The most likely result is that I will block your profile to avoid any online interactions if possible.

Search engines (Google, Bing, DuckDuckGo, etc.)

It is becoming increasingly common for web searches to be done on individuals, however, I do not search for any information about my clients as I wish for any information I have about my clients to come from them directly. I will not follow or seek out any of your social media, blogs etc., so if there is something you would like to share with me, please do so in our sessions. 

You are free to search for information about me. I would suggest that if you do so and you find anything you wish to discuss, you bring this to our sessions. 

Advertising sites & directories (e.g. Pink Therapy, Psychology Today, Counselling Directory, etc) 

It is likely that you found me through some kind of directory or web search. Some of these directories may store your details so it is best to check their privacy policy directly if you are concerned. Some of these sites like nextdoor, google+, yell.com etc. allow for clients to leave reviews. I do not ask my clients to do so, however if you would like to leave one please do consider your confidentiality and limitations of anonymity when doing so. 

Download the privacy policy 

Header image by Jasmin Sessler on Unsplash